Hi, I’m Hashtag Hannah™
— Optimized to death. Soulless in execution.
Vanilla
Checklist energy: Shows up like she took a course on “How to Win Social Media” and followed it to the letter — but missed the module on authenticity.
It’s giving: “#Everything #Everywhere #AllAtOnce #ButWhyTho”
How I Show Up Online
Facebook:
Posts like “Ready to level up your life?” with 38 hashtags — none relevant.
Tagging random pages and pasting in viral audio descriptions.
Overuses phrases like “Let’s normalize…” and “This 👇”
Instagram:
Carousels titled “5 Ways to Own Your Morning” with perfectly aligned slides — and zero emotion.
Hashtags include:
#BossBabe #CEO #Manifest #MindsetMatters #WomenSupportingWomen #MotivationMonday #HackYourLife
Story highlights = icons. No human touch.
TikTok / Shorts:
Content that’s clearly templated:
Voiceover says “A tip that changed my business…” but she never shows her face or shares why it matters.
Description is overloaded:
“Use this tip now ⬇️
#MarketingStrategy #SmallBizTips #GrowOnTikTok #FYP #Coaching #SideHustle #MomLife #DigitalProducts”
YouTube:
Uploads once a month with titles like:
“7 Productivity Hacks That Changed My Life ✨”
Thumbnail: A stock photo + text overlay. Zero comments.
LinkedIn:
Posts articles with buzzwords like “disruptive innovation” but no POV.
Copy-paste intros like:
“If you’re an entrepreneur, this post is for you!”
(…but it’s for no one, really.)
Pinterest:
Repins infographics and “quote of the day” graphics from Canva templates.
Her own pins are unclickable PDFs uploaded as images.
Threads:
“Consistency > Talent. Show up anyway.
#Hustle #ContentMarketing #EntrepreneurLife”
Biggest Lie I Tell Myself
“If I’m visible, I’m valuable.”
My Root Fear or Wound
If I stop following the rules, I’ll disappear.
If I’m myself, it won’t be “good enough.”
What People Feel When They Land On My Content
“She’s trying so hard.”
…and they keep scrolling. It feels surface-level and manufactured.